Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Do You Have Game?

I know that this is a weird thing to ask. But do you have game? As in flirting ability. Dating type of thing. The ability to flirt your way to a free drink or two.

Why am I asking? Some friends and I were talking about this recently. I know it's a weird topic. But still. We were talking. And you know what, I have absolutely no game! At least I feel like I have no game.

Sure, onstage, I can flirt and "wow" like the best of them. I know how to turn a song into a flirty adventure. Make things go all hot and steamy. But away from the stage, I'm horrible! It's like everything is left onstage.

I never, ever even came close to flirting in high school. I barely talked to the 2 guys I liked. Years later, I find out that they liked me. But were unsure of how I felt. You know, because I didn't talk to them. And I most certainly didn't flirt with them...

In college, I wasn't much better. I became everyone's best friend. All of my guy friends, well we were buddies. We'd just hangout. And when I did date, it was all because of the men. I wasn't about to start that adventure.

Now that I've been in a serious relationship, for 2 1/2 years, I still lack in those skills. Which is hilarious! Because My Guy, he's got game. Serious game! Women fall at his feet. Although, these days, he rarely notices. But I notice. Me? Flirting? Not at all. He makes me blush when he starts his flirting antics. Because I feel like we're 15, and first dating.

But that's him. Mr. Flirt. He knows all the perfect things to say. The way to look at you. Just all of those things to do. He walks with "swagger." Maybe that comes from what he does for a living. You know, he's used to the spotlight. Maybe it comes from years and experience. I mean, I'd think I was cool too, if I had dated some of the women that he has. That "swagger" it has to come from that.

I'm still that awkward woman. That is not happy with the way she looks. Constantly annoyed with my hair. Thinks my thighs are too fat. And wonders, why in the world My Guy loves me. I have no game. I try. But I don't. Dress me up for work, and all of a sudden, I "strut." But that's the only time. Like high heels bring the confidence.

My friends ask me why. Why don't I have game? I don't know. I should. I should be the woman that says, "Hey. Ya, you! Look who I'm dating. I know you want him. I know he's one of the most sought after "bachelors. Ya, he loves me!" But behind the scenes, I'm not that confident. Ya, My Guy comes home to me. For some 30 months, he has come home to me. The woman that he loves. But I don't feel that confidence that I should. Not about him. But about me. I lack that self confidence.

I'm unsure. Not because of My Guy. I know he loves me. I'm the only one in his life. The only one that he wants. But "My Game," it doesn't exist. OK, if you ask him, he'd say different. He'd tell you, I've got mad game. But I really don't think so. I blush way too easy. I get flustered with my words. And to be honest, I can barely flirt.

Do you have game? I think part of it is, you have to be a little vulnerable. You need to show people a part of you. A part that they can fall in love with. And I'm well, a bit too guarded. But I'm getting better. My Guy and I have pretty much mastered the art of "flirtatious talk." You know, as I'm trying to write a paper for school. And he's going over contracts. While we're in workout clothes, in the den. Or when I'm cooking. My hair is usually a wreck, and I've got food splattered everywhere. That's when I seem to be most confident.

So maybe it's all in the eye of the beholder. Do you have game? Maybe you should ask the people around you. Because now that I think of it, I do get a lot of free food from the hospital cafeteria. Maybe I have a little bit of game. ♥

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