Sunday, August 14, 2011

My Mr.

Some days, it just about kills me to be away from this guy. Yes, that would be my Mr. This morning in particular, made my heart break. I had to leave early in the morning. To catch my flight home. I need to get home, for Amelia's Baby Shower. My poor friend, she's due any day now. And we still haven't given her a shower! Oh, and I'm going to be Baby A's Godmother.

So I knew, that I had to get on the plane. And it was early. On a "Work Day" for this Mr. Who is more used to waking up 20 minutes, before he has to be at work. So I quietly kissed him goodbye. Only for My Guy, to wake up. I got that, "Come back to bed. You really don't have to go. Do you?" Half asleep, he pulled me into a hug. Lightly kissing my cheek. The way he does, when I can't sleep. And he's trying to lull me back to my slumber.

My heart broke. I let him fall back asleep. And I gently got out of bed. Making sure not to wake the man I love. I made my way to the door, picked up my bags, and got in the car. The entire ride to the airport, my heart was breaking. I felt bad. I thought about all the ways I could head back. And still make it to the Baby Shower. I knew it wasn't possible.

Before anyone gets too sick over my little story, I do love this man. With every fiber of my being. He does so much for me! Taking care of me when I'm sick. And well, that happens to be all too often. He makes sure that all my needs are met. Takes his jacket off for me, because I'm always cold. No matter what. He calls my friends, to find out what I've been pining over. Then I mysteriously get it in the mail. And he loves me. I know this. With absolutely no doubt in my mind!

In our relationship, things are a little different than most. He works a very public job. Hence, why we keep our identities, a little more guarded on the net. At least 70% of his life, is lived under a microscope. So I try to make his life better. Easier.

I've worked out a way, to travel with him. Every week. And I try to make life easier on him. I get his schedule. I memorize it, and help him to stick to it. I make sure that he is up on time, dressed appropriately, and has eaten. I make sure there are meals for everyone on his team. I take care of crisis. Whatever I can do, I do.

At the same time, he takes care of me. Makes sure that I don't worry about day to day financial issues. Makes sure I'm taken care of health wise. We are there for one another. And especially from now until November, I feel like I need to be there for My Guy. It's tough. But it's what we know works for us. It's the best possible solution.

So on an important weekend like this, I feel bad. To leave him. And not be his supporter, biggest cheerleader, and just his best friend. Yes, we'll talk on the phone. And all those people will wonder exactly who he's talking to. He'll just smile. And be happy that we talked. I'll have a knot in my stomach. Because I should be there.

Sometimes, it's just hard to live this life. To live a private life, in a very public way. I'm positive that people know he's dating someone. But we've chosen to keep the "Who" a secret. It's tough to be apart. Especially when we need each other. But I also know, that for this thing to work, we need to have our own interests, and projects. And we look at it this way, the only way we're going to miss each other, is if we're apart. So, in a few days, I'll be over the moon. Because we'll be back together. Cuddling on the couch, catching up on life, laughing at silly TV shows. Until then, I have a Goddaughter to prepare for. ♥

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