Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Kegger in the Desert...

Before I explain that title, let me just say this, it's been 10 years! Well, almost. 10 years since I walked across that stage, claimed my diploma, and entered the "real world." A bit scary...

I knew that my reunion was coming up. You see, my niece is graduating this year. From my old high school. And we have been talking about a lot of the things, that I did in high school. About graduation and prom. And of course, her graduation party...and going away to college.

It's brought back a lot of memories. Not all good. But definitely not all bad. I remember that day. My friends and I promised to stay close. Even though most of us were moving away. Honestly, I didn't see many of them past that day. Nowadays, I'm lucky to see any of them. Sad, but true.

There were a handful of graduation parties that I went to. I seen a handful of my friends. And right before I moved, I had lunch with some of my closest friends. Yes, some of my friends attended the same college as me. But honestly, I only saw them a handful of times. Some of these people, I had seen every single day, in high school. During our time in college, it may have 3 or 4 times. In total!

My friends that remained in my hometown, well we tried. Not well. But we tried. I e-mailed. We called. But life just took us in different directions. I met some incredible people in college. I went down a different road. Found true blue, soul mate type friends. And all those high school friends...well they became more of memories.

I tried to stay connected on MySpace. I did well...for a short while. I tried e-mail again. I'm just too busy to really stay connected. I don't have hours to pour into Facebook. But I have reconnected with a handful of people. It's been ages, since I've actually seen anyone from high school.

The other night, I told my Mr. that I wanted to search out some info, on my graduating class. I got on the Facebook account for his business. I know...but whatever. I wanted to do a little "spying." After an hour or so, I had found a good amount of my graduating class. And then...our Facebook page for our reunion.

There was a survey. And talk about getting together. Sometime between this Summer and Fall. I thought, after the weekend, I'll come back and send that e-mail. I had received another e-mail from a previously close friend. Telling me about the reunion. And potentially getting together for lunch.

But when I came back to that Facebook page, I was a little disgusted. Most of my graduating class wanted a "Kegger in the Desert." Typical. I'm sure I graduated with a bunch of bafoons. No lie! Wasn't it bad enough, that they would tear up the desert, when we were in high school? Now, they want to celebrate our 10 years with getting wasted out there again...

Funny how previous to this discovery, I had considered going to my reunion. Not for the reunion itself. But to get back in touch, with a handful of friends. The ones that I miss. You know, like my "big brother" friend. Or my friend who was supposed to be my freshman roomie. The one friend that made me laugh so incredibly hard...all the time! Those friends. Maybe a cheerleader or two. Maybe someone that I didn't really talk to in high school. But because of social media, we'd connected.

But now, I'm pretty sure that I'm not going. I work 100 hours a week. Every week! Plus I travel with my Mr. It's hard to take time off. It's tough to not be on the road, supporting my Mr. But I was going to do it. Until I realized, these people have not changed. Not one bit!

10 years may have past, but they're the same people. The ones that I had very little in common with, let's be real, that's almost 95% of my graduating class! I was always the girl in the background anyway. It didn't matter that I was a cheerleader...or in every extra curricular activity. It didn't matter. I was the ONLY senior left out of the Senior video. How ironic.

I tutored more athletes than I can remember. Helped them pass classes to play sports. I decorated for all those school dances. Um, I only went to 2. Because my friends dragged me to them. I was always around, but never really seen. And I'm positive, I don't want to go back there. I'm positive, no one will miss me.

Do I wish that I had stayed in touch with some friends? Yes. Funny thing is, the people that I would have never thought about staying in touch with, some athletes, are the ones that I see more often. They've been to some of my shows. We've worked various events together. Funny how that worked out...

Others, well, I don't know. I think I would rather get together with older classes. Friends that were a year or two older. Funny how I would rather go to Enzo's reunion, than my own. I was closer to those people. Not the ones I went to school with.

Maybe it's my insecurities talking. Maybe I'm crazy. But I never felt like I "belonged" there. Never. I was the awkward cheerleader. The student that sat in the back of the class. Rarely ever talked. The cheerleader that never really "fit in." I did a lot of the "background" work. Planning, working, studying. I was the dork, geek, the weirdo.

I never dated anyone from my high school. OK, so there was that Guy...I had a MAJOR crush on him. Funny how all these years later, he admitted, that he had wanted to ask me to Prom. But was scared. Funny! Now we e-mail each other, at least once a week. Crazy how that works out.

Like I said, I didn't go to school dances. I really wasn't close to people at my high school. I didn't want a date. I almost kissed the ground, when some of my friends, were getting married on my Homecoming. Great excuse to miss the dance! I was dragged and tricked into Winter Ball. It was miserable. I can't believe I went. But I had a BLAST at Prom! Ironically, a bunch of my friends and I went. Together. Just a bunch of girls. Having a great time!

Not all of high school was miserable. There were fun trips. Great memories with some of the cheerleaders. Fun nights of hanging out. Great friends. Lots of laughter. OK, so I may have threatened our AD to take my name off of the ballet for Homecoming. And I might have wanted to kill that one athlete. But it was a fun time.

I'm just not at the point of "wanting" to go back. To dealing with a couple of 100 people, that didn't notice me. Or just were flat out mean. The few, as in 10 or so, people that I miss...I hope there is another way to get in touch with them. I'd love to reconnect with them. The rest, well, they're better left in the past. Right were they belong. ♥

No comments: