Sunday, May 16, 2010

My Doll Face

My Love,

I'm hijacking your blog. It's a good thing I know your password. I just wanted to write ya a note.

We just got home. And you're absolutely exhausted. You slept on the plane home. Ya also slept on the way home from the airport. I didn't have the heart to wake ya when we finally got home. 2 dogs in tow. I carried ya in and got ya up to bed. I sit here watching ya sleep like an angel. You look so peaceful. God knows, ya need some peace in your life.

How in the hell I got this lucky, God I'll never know. I'm thinking Daddy sent ya to me. He knows I need someone to take care of me. Someone to keep my ass in line. Who isn't scared to hell, of my glares when I'm pissed. Ya are such a strong woman. I still don't know how you do it. I'm in awe.

For some time, my life was boring. Lacking something or someone. In one word, life was...lackadaisical. It was routine. Boring. Filled with people that I couldn't trust. Having to make appearances. Everyone needing an answer, a sound bite, or some other piece of crap from me. Then I found you.

I feel love from ya that I can't describe. Every week when ya kiss me good luck and send me off to work, I feel pride. I want to go out there and kick some ass. Just for you. I yearn for the day when I can hold you in public. When there is no longer a reason to shield ya. When I can tell the world that you are my Lady. My Love.

Today, I felt like a piece of shit. Nothing went right. Still, everyone needed some piece of me. All I wanted to do was get that shit done. I can't explain the frustration or disappointment I felt. But it was bad. The entire way back to ya, I felt bad. Until I opened the door. There you were. Standing with a big smile and open arms.

If you can smile like that, I have nothing to bitch about. My love of my life, is fighting for her life. You are shielded and hidden from my public world. But you are still there with a smile and a kiss for me. I feel bad because I put ya through so much shit with my work. Somehow, ya don't leave running. I don't know how ya do it. I really don't. It just goes to show your strength.

I'm just glad that ya love me. It's that simple. I can't imagine my life without ya now. As you lay here sleeping, all I can think about is laying down beside ya. Holding you in my arms. And making your world a better place. I love ya. It's simple. But I don't think ya really know, how much ya mean to me. My world would be nothing without ya in it.

I heard this song on our way home. It reminded me of ya. Of us. I want to grow old with you. I know, I've got a few years on ya. But ya know what I mean. I can see a couple of fair skinned kids in our future. Living out here in BFE. Chasing around some dogs. I can see that. I know you can too. Love ya Doll Face! Your Guy

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